What happened to "Why is the sky blue?"

Today my 4 year old son, Elijah asked me "Daddy, why do rappers love women?" Where did that come from? How does he know about rappers? and their "love" of women?  Where do I start? I had no idea. I stumbled through a long drawn out intellectual discourse on race, class, sex and power, and threw in a gratuitous contrast to me and his moms relationship: Me, not being a rapper and loving 1 woman, his mom. Note to self: No more Snoop Dogg on the radio with the kids in the car, even if it's a "classic".

more questions

A few days ago, my son Elijah asked me "Daddy, how did God make himself?" ....... LONG pause. I actually had to do some research and get back to him on that one. Yesterday, he asked me about electricity. "Daddy, is electricity hot like fire?", "yes son. It is." And you know what question came next: "Why Daddy?" ,    pause    "Well, because it carries power." "You mean like firepower Daddy?" (Oh no, is he thinking about weaponry? Must redirect, come on, think quick) "Uh, well, kind of, it's more like raw power." (what the hell is raw power? You gotta come up with something better than that...) "I know Daddy, it comes from Sunpower?" (Defeated by ignorance and an overpowering 4 year old inquisitiveness, I go along with it. Sounds good to me) "yeah, (nodding slowly) Sunpower." 

Well, now that I have done the research to find out that electricity is caused by electrons passing a negative charge to positively charged ions, I have to go back and explain to him that yes, he was right about firepower AND Sunpower (especially since the sun is a big ball of fire, duh) because electricity is hot because of ELEMENTAL power and passing of charges. This will require a lesson on the basic elements of nature (earth, wind and fire I guess). Then he will probably appreciate some kind of experiment (walking on a rug then shocking eachother).

Elijahs questions a joy and highlight of my day and also a constant reminder of how much I don't know.

Deep Questions

Today my 4 year old son Elijah asked me "Daddy, what does it feel like to die?" I am used to him asking me questions that I have never been asked before nor have a clue about the answer, so I said, "I don't know son. That's a good question. I guess it depends on how you die. If you die a hard death, it may be painful but if you die a peaceful timely death, it might actually feel good."
Although I am a world class bullshitter, I am always humbled to struggle to give the most honest, thoughtful, informed answers to my sons deep questions. And afterwards, I think about the question long afterwards and he has moved on to playing with his legos.

Can't take the heat

Context:
For my 35th birthday, my wife got me my ancestors. She got me a DNA test that will determine with 99% accuracy, what village (and modern day country) my ancestors are from. The test will go back between 500 and 10,000 years. I am so juiced. I can't wait to find out which African language, history and culture belongs to MY ancestors. There is a catch: The test is a patrilineal test and there's a 30% chance my ancestry will show up European. This should need no explanation.

Clown:
So last week we were driving out to Concord and it's 70 degrees outside. I am sweating. I ask my wife if she is hot. She flatly replies "no". I complain again about the heat and she says "You're not African!" and turns on the AC for me. I laughed, but if I get my results this week and they say my 17th generation grandfather is from Northern Ireland, I'ma be dissapointed.

Stay tuned for the results... unless of course they are European, then I just won't mention it ever again.

UPDATE: "I am an African! My results came back 100% match, Fulani Tribe. They are primarily in Gunnea-Bissau today, but they travelled all over Africa and came from the east. I am proud to have a connection to my people going back before the atlantic slave trade. My history no longer begins with "slaves" but with the Fula!

Legendary Encounter: True Story!

Walking with my sons in a stroller one day, I see this brotha across the street staring at me. He looks just like Paul Mooney, the comedian and former writer for Richard Pryor. Paul does very serious, very funny commentary on white racism, black foolishness and everything inbetween so I was truly amazed to realize that it was indeed THE Paul Mooney wearing a crazy get up walking toward me with a grin, holding a cigarette proclaiming "Hey, I know what you like to do!" Presumably he was insinuating that I like to have sex a lot because I have 2 children but I am quick to point out to people who make that assumption that it only proves that I enjoyed myself twice in the last 5 years for approximately 5 - 12 minutes each time. I ain't saying I even know exactly how long it took or that those are the only times I had relations but I'm just making a point: Kids don't equal oversexed black man, a stereotype brothas usually revel in whether the assumption is true or false. But all of this would be lost on the legendary Paul Mooney, making a punch line out of my late afternoon stroll with my kids. I realize instantly that he doesn't perform for an audience, he amuses himself, everywhere he goes. The world is his entertainment. Such is the life of a black comedian. When we are not angry, we think shit is hella funny and will revel in the humor of a situation as long as possible.

Sporting this grin, Paul Mooney walks right up to me to shake my hand. I greet him like I know him "Hey Paul, how you doing!" We share pleasantries and continue on our separate journeys, and I think to myself, 'no ones going to believe this!'

Fatherhood flashes

I used the bathroom today and my son Elijah ran into the bathroom to use it after me. He did his business and promptly ran out of the bathroom. I yelled to him "Hey, you not going to flush?" and without breaking stride, in a whimsical tone he said "No". Needless to say I made him come back and flush (and wash his hands) but just goes to show that retorical questions don't always work with 4 year olds.
The other day I went to the market to get some stuff. I had my boys with me. I am leaving and see a brotha in the parking lot selling Obama t-shirts. I make a comment, he makes a pitch "got all sizes, just $10, etc." Then the shopping cart that I am pushing my sons in suddenly stops. Apparently they have an invisible boundary a few feet from the store and if you cross it the wheels lock and the cart stops right in it's tracks. I am scooping Cameron and the brotha doesn't miss a beat and grabs Elijah up out of the cart. I had several silent reactions in a split second.
1. I got this bruh, no need to invade my invisible family bubble. Personal space, personal space!
2. Thanks bro, it takes a village to raise a child, each one teach one, Umoja! Good looking out.
3. But dude, I DON"T KNOW YOU. Why are you so quick to grab my son, not cool.
4. He's setting him down gently, Elijahs not freaked out, that was helpful, okay, thanks man.
5. I hope he don't think I am going to buy his t-shirt.

Then finally I say out loud, "Thanks man, take it easy, aright"

Can we all get along? Hell naw!

With the tragic killing of Oscar Grant in Oakland by a BART police, young people took to the streets and raised hell. There were demonstrations, many of them organized, coordinated, and peaceful. And some of them was just raising hell. Breaking windows, burning cars, confronting police, etc. The family pleads for peace and says "Oscar would not have wanted people (rioting) in the streets, etc..." It was reminicient of the Rodney King "Can we all just get along" plea during the LA riots.
Well, for the record, if I get shot in the back while unarmed, face down by a cop, I want lots of rioting. Property damage is unfortunate for those business owners and car owners who got caught in the riot but it doesn't compare to the loss of life and a statement has to be made.

I know this ain't the politically correct thing for an over 30 person who pays all his taxes to say but fuck that. People can't do the silent protest thing when the Mayor hadn't said nothing and the district attorney wasn't talking about an investigation or nothing. Now, after the riots, you have the Mayor talking all day and night about it, demanding an independent police investigation and the district attorney promising an investigation. I don't think speaker cards at the City council meeting would have gotten the same attention and traction a good old fashioned riot brings. So if I get done wrong, I'ma need ya'll to raise some hell!